Letters To Dad

Dear Daddy #1

Every night before I go to sleep, I wonder what you're doing.
I think about what if you we're here, how my nights would be different.
Maybe I would actually be sleeping, rather than over thinking so much.

They say you never know anything until you've been through it.
I never knew how it felt to be Father-less, until I grew up and became a teenager.

Everyone always tells me, how hard my Mom works just to keep us happy.
She has to be the Father figure and still be an amazing Mom at the same time.

And for that, I could never forgive you for.

I know she tries to protect me from everything, but there's only so much a
Mom is suppose to do for her daughter, the rest is suppose to be done by you.
But your not here, so everything changes and takes a different position.

I wish you knew, how much I miss you.
And I wish you knew how much it hurts me to miss you.

People don't like you because you left us here, all alone in Canada.
But for some reason, no matter what anyone says my love for you continues to grow.
It grows through all my pain, my tears for you and my happiness of memories left.

Dad, I sometimes blame myself for you not being here.
Sometimes I feel like maybe I wasn't all that you wished for, or just not good enough.
Not beautiful enough, not smart enough, not worthy enough.

You have your own family now, so what am I suppose to think of you?
I guess I just have to continue hope, that one day you'll come around.

I've been waiting 9 whole years; I don't know how much longer my heart can wait.
But just know one thing, your missing out on two Exquisite kids.

Myself, and your son.

He's lost, because he doesn't have you. Every son needs a Father Daddy.
It's not fair, you say your trying. But I don't think your trying hard enough.

What's the price for your love? A phone call? A letter?
What's the price Dad? 'Cause in my heart, it's all free.


Dear Daddy #2

Grandma always tells me, I look more & more like you everyday.
It should be the best compliment to me, because I love you so much.
But every time I look myself in the mirror, all I see is you.

All I see is you Daddy,
and it just makes it so hard to understand.

I'm not going to lie, I'm a little Sase Jr.
Anyone can look at me and see that I'm yours.

But why can't you be the one to show me that?
There isn't any excuse why you can't call us, email us, visit us?
Guyana is just miles away, but your love is invisible.

Daddy I will always love you, you are my bestfriend.
We we're so close back home, we used to play 'Super Mario' all the time.
Just me, you & Nikko.

I wish those days, we're right now.

Not only have I lost my Daddy, but I've lost my big brother.
And I blame that on you.

You we're suppose to be there, you we're suppose to be there for him.
Teach him what he needed to be a wonderful gentlemen.

Mom tries so hard to be the Father figure, but the truth is Dad, she can't.
Only you can.

Why aren't you there, why can't you just call.
Saying 'I love you love-bird' isn't good enough anymore.

'Love-Bird' is what you used to call me, do you remember?
That was our nickname. That's how I remember you.

Dad, I can't say anything other than I miss you.
I miss my big brother, I miss how our family used to be.

I'm 17 now, last time I saw you I was just 7 turning 8.
I'm big now, a young lady. And I'm a very good person.
I learned well from Grandpa & Grandma!

I miss Grandpa all the time, he gave me my passion of writing.
He thought me a lot; and so did Grandpa. I get my cooking from her.

I was fine, until I became wise.
Now all I ask myself is, where's my Dad?


Dear Daddy #3

Dad you would be so proud of your little girl today.
I have talents, I have gifts, I have ambition and I have dreams.

I'm a good person, with a big heart.
Some people don't recognize it, but I hear it beat.

Nikko is a wonderful young man, he has your qualities.
We always hear how sweet of a man you are and how much everyone loves you.
Well you'd be glad to know, your son is just like you.

The woman that marries my big brother, will be the luckiest girl in the world.
I think he misses you, more than I do sometimes. He just hides it a lot.

He's a great great guy, I think he's just lost without you.
Mom tries to show him the way, but Daddy that's your job.
Mommy can only do so much, she's good too. So beautiful.

I must admit, my parents are two beautiful people.
You'd be proud of her too, she's the most strongest woman I know.
I may not always show it, but I love her with everything I have.

My little sister, is a blessing.
She keeps me balanced you know, when I'm good she helps me.
Even on my bad days, she still loves me; forever unconditionally.

So I have no complaining to do, because I have the best family.
We're not all perfect, but then again which human-being is? Not even God is.

I need you all the time, I need advice on boys, I need advice on life.
I need you to tell me what to do, when I miss Grandpa.

It's hard growing up without a father figure in the house.
But with a Mom like I have, we've seem to manage pretty well.


Dear Daddy #4

I remember every single 'Father's Day'.

Back in elementary school, my teacher used to have us make Father's Day cards.
Everyone would be so excited to make them, smiling about what to write and how
their Dad's would react. They we're just so happy you know.

But me, I'd always be on the carpet just reading a book, looking at the other kids smiles.
Just wondering and hoping one day, maybe that would be me.

Every Father's Day, I would hide under my covers & hold my 'Mr.Bear' and simply cry.
Cry my heart and soul out, just hoping you'd show up at the door. Like old times.

But you didn't.
And 10 years passed.

Now my biggest fear, is living through each one of those 'Father's Days' to come.
And feeling the same way I do right now, for the rest of my life.


Dear Daddy #5

Dad you know what makes me angry.

When I see my friends and family taking their Father's for granted.
Going everyday without saying 'I love you Dad' or 'Good-morning Dad' ...
Instead they just go on with their days, just knowing their Dad will be there.
Not appreciating the fact that they actually have a Dad.

And I hate it.

'Cause I just wish that we're me, and my big brother.
You know, knowing the fact that I would kill to have my Dad there.
And they do; yet they take that for granted.

And I hate it.
So much Dad, so much.

I would kill to have you in my life.
But all I can do is, pray and be strong for my family and I.


Dear Daddy #6

Your birthday is coming up, August 12th.

I'm wondering how I'm going to react this year.
Is it going to be another phone call to Guyana and have you not be there.
Then cry?

Or simply, reminisce on our memories and just hold them close.

I don't know anymore Dad, I don't understand anymore.
The world can't understand, Nobody can.

It's just, to hard to try to figure out anymore.

But I always pray for you. To just smile and make sure your sight gets better.
I pray that your happy on your birthday and that your always safe.

I love you Daddy, more than words could explain.


Dear Daddy #7

Daddy you know what my favourite part of weddings is?
When the bride is walking down the isle with her Father on her hand,
you simply look into his eyes and see his face, and that is priceless.

But my favourite part, is the Father & Daughter dance.

It's beautiful and a moment nobody can take away.
I wonder If I'll ever get to have one at my wedding,
I wonder If you'll be there to walk me down the isle and take part in my special day.

I want you to be there Daddy.
No matter what it takes, I want you there.